Nobody Smart Wants to Live in New England
The WSJ reports that states all over New England are launching marketing campaigns, internship programs, college comedy tours—anything to keep young college grads from fleeing New England for other, better places. Well, it won’t work. Any idiot can do the math on New England:
Plus: Quaint. Minus: Quaint.
Plus: Fall foliage, apple picking. Minus: Your lifeless body was found frozen atop Mount Washington after you went out for a quick October hike.
Plus: Skiing. Minus: Eight months a year of icy hell, virtually entombing you in a pre-modern lifestyle of woodchopping and indoor-huddling.
Plus: You can spot a wild black bear from your back yard. Minus: He ate you.
Plus: Boston. Minus: Fuck Boston.